Have you ever caught yourself changing your opinions, laughing at a joke you didn’t find funny, or staying quiet just to get a seat at the table?
If you have felt that familiar, heavy pull to blend in, you are definitely not alone. Whether we are navigating the halls of high school, trying to find our people on a new sports team, or even standing around chatting at the PTO, all of us want to be liked and included. It is a fundamental human need to connect, and there is zero shame in wanting that sense of community.
The trouble starts when chasing other people's approval becomes more important than being true to ourselves. As a teen and young adult wellbeing coach, I talk about this all the time with families because it is one of the quietest struggles our kids face, and honestly, one we grapple with as adults too.
We want our teenagers to feel confident and secure, but watching them twist themselves into knots to fit in can break our hearts. Let's explore how we can help our teens move away from people-pleasing and toward authentic connection through small baby steps.
Highlights For Moms Of Teens & Young Adults In This Episode:
Understanding the core difference between changing yourself to fit in and being accepted for who you are
How to help your teenager build an identity independent of peer approval
Managing the heavy emotions of social rejection and minor teenage heartbreak without stepping in to fix everything
Taking small, intentional social risks to build genuine confidence over time
Common Question About Teens Fitting In And Belonging
What should I do when my teenager gets left out or feels like they don't have a friend group?
Sometimes they need you to acknowledge just how much it hurts before they are ready to hear any advice. You can validate their disappointment without agreeing with the negative story that something is wrong with them.
Connect with Me:
I’m Laura Ollinger, a teen and young adult well-being coach who helps moms of teens and young adults build the confidence, connection, and direction they need to guide their teen towards becoming an independent and responsible adult.
Resources and Links For Moms Of Teens And Young Adults
Coaching might help you or your teen find the confidence, connection and direction you need in this season of teen and young adult life. Reach out when you are ready to learn more about this personalized approach.
Let’s Connect On Instagram @positivelyhealthycoaching
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